**F\*\*\*** this Covid, I thought to myself, having cursed the pandemic countless times. This time wasn’t that much different. If it wasn’t for the pandemic, I would have had a blissful college life. After finishing my CIE-3, I was thinking of writing the improvement CIE, I sat in my room looking over my “to-do list” which comprised Experiential Learning-Phase 2, English Essay, and lastly CAED submission. I glanced over the deadlines, the English one was due tomorrow so I started to write it. The deeper I went to writing, the more lost I was.

I kept thinking about this cursed pandemic. Well, I’m not the only person who is facing difficulties. Many people are facing problems, and if we look from the perspective of those people, we would feel lucky for not having those problems.

Have you ever seen a child staring at an empty glass cup imagining that his dad would pick him now and play with him? But unfortunately, as he was a COVID-19 ambulance driver he had worked intensely during the lockdown, but The Covid-19 didn’t leave him too, he was affected by the virus and he died.

![covid_croud](https://miro.medium.com/max/700/0*yLsSgVnuYumLZcrV)

Can you imagine that child’s pain, sorrow, the devastating look in his eyes, the cold hand waiting to be warmed by hugging someone close to him but there is no one, not even his mother, he had lost his mother because of premature birth now the only thing he used to hug was also disappeared.

As cold as this sounds, he might be one of the luckiest ones to be born during this era where people have a shot of living even if they get sick. We have been through a countless number of wars because of some trivial misunderstanding and someone’s ego not being able to take that. As clumsy as this sounds, we are still here at this moment. That’s why my favourite quote is “Yesterday was the past, Tomorrow is the future, But today, My friend is the present! That’s why today is called a gift”

You are still here, you shouldn’t exist. Yet you are, so let me say it clearly without a doubt, you are a miracle.

A wise man once said,

> “Our daily lives we spend like this, might just be a series of miracles.” Our existence is so obvious that we take them for granted. That doesn’t change the fact that we shouldn’t be existing right now… it’d take the faintest miracle to be here.”

While imagining these I was suddenly questioning myself, _Why do I exist?_

Well, I’m still looking for an answer.

Shit! My English essay submission is tomorrow I gotta go bye 👋

Hope Y’all had a pleasant read.